Some people spend their entire life searching for love and never find it. Some people find love all too often. But what is this thing called love that drives relationships and marriages? Is it a chemical imbalance in the body? Is it the soul of one connected with the soul of another? There may not be a textbook definition of what love is, but we all can relate to a time where this feeling of love and/or being in love was as true as the setting of the sun. In my studies on love in my Ancient Philosophy class I have narrowed down to the best description of what I think love is and how it relates to Society today.
-Love Has Two Faces
In Plato's Symposium it is discussed by Pausanias that there are two kinds of love that Humans are capable of: Common Love and Heavenly Love. Common love in what can be described as simple attraction. It is a type of love that must first be attained before Heavenly Love is even possible. We must first find something in another individual that we are attracted to. It could be their beautiful smile, It could be their brilliance, or even the way they slice a steak. Either way there must be something that draws us to them to even contemplate love. We as humans are easily capable of "common love", therefore it is not this love that most people refer to when they say they love someone. But without initial attraction or "Common Love" one cannot possibly be capable of true love. And if what initially attracted you to someone is lost, then that knowingly or unknowingly results in "falling out of love." "Heavenly Love" is described as finding good in the works of an individual. We are presented with the task of moving past initial attraction and now towards celebrating the works. The easiest way to explain this is if the paths of you and your beloved are matched you can achieve this love. You cannot love someone who drinks if you absolutely despise drinking. You cannot love someone if you are tight with money and your spouse spends frivolously. You cannot truly love someone if you are walking with Christ and they have never been to church. Too many times I hear of people say that if (insert name here) would just change, we would be happy. The truth of the matter is most people aren't capable of drastic change, and forcing something where there is nothing will always lead to failure. What happens many times is we find ourselves stuck in common love with someone and try and force our way into heavenly love because this person is really pretty, or this person makes me feel a certain way, or this person does this for me that no one else can. So we hold on and we try and force a situation that is not ordained to work. This is the main reason people are stuck in abusive relationships and why people stay in relationships where their significant other is not faithful. Think about it. if you are currently "In Love", why is it that you love this person? Is it because they are beautiful, or they make you feel special, or they are very intellectual? Or do you love them because all these things plus they are heading the same direction you are in life, that your walk with God and their walk with God is one in the same? If it is the latter then you my friend are truly in love, and if not you need to reevaluate your current situation.
